Onions and Vocal Cords

Every family has their oddities, or I should say every person. Two of mine are that I worry about things like "damaging your vocal cords" and that I had bunion surgery the summer before 9th grade.

Big deal right?

I spent a lot of money learning about vocal cords back in my readin' ritin' 'rithmetic days,  so I might as well train my children to be paranoid of injuring their vocal cords :-). I can't deny that I try to enforce good vocal habits (drink lotsa water, don't make crazy sounds that will strain your voice and my ears.

It wouldn't be unusual to hear this phrase in my house, "My vocal cords are hurting." I always get a good smile about that one. I wish I could post a cool picture of vocal folds on here.

You gotta admit, that is cool isn't it? I am fascinated by it. I am always wondering about birds and whether or not they have vocal cords. Anyway . . . I am pretty sure my child had a sore throat, not sore vocal cords.

The other oddity is those bunions of mine. Again, I will find a cool picture to illustrate.

http://www.webmd.com/skin-problems-and-treatments/picture-of-bunion

I inherited my bad bunions. But, I hold no disregard for the people before me. Honest, I don't. There is still a slight scar on my feet and my children like to inspect scars. So, they've heard my story many times (about having surgery and having to wear two gigantic boots and how my friend came and played "Easy Money" with me the entire summer when I was laid up).

So, the funny thing is that my youngest daughter will look at my dainty (ha ha) little feet and say, "Mom, are those your onions?"

What kind of odd things are you passing onto your children?

My own little Stevie Wonder

Last week my daughter's eyes were dialated for an eye exam. She was given a pair of flimsy sunglasses to be worn out in the sun for the hours following the appointment. I really didn't think anything of the glasses. I saw that she didn't want to wear them into her school when I dropped her off and left it at that.

This morning, I noticed she had those glasses in her backpack still.

When I picked her up this afternoon, I saw a girl walking along the sidewalk, kind of a determined-neck-forward type look. It was none other than my own little Stevie Wonder:

I have been chuckling about this all afternoon. I guess she thinks she still needs to be wearing her special glasses. I wonder what all of the passersby were thinking about my daughter :-).

Counting Steps

Yesterday my children were introduced to:  Pedometers. Cool huh?

We all ran a 5k in our community. The company sponsering it handed out pedometers at the beginning of the race.


The Joys of my life
 

My children were all about their pedometers and kept checking to see how many steps they'd taken. The pedometers had a little clip that a person could attach to the waist of their shorts.







The day was cold and fun, the pedometers were a lot of fun. This part was also fun:


Seattle Seahawks mascot -- the band in the background was right at the end of the race, what a super way to end a race

This morning at church, I sat next to my youngest daughter. She looked up at me with a look that let me know she was trying to be discreet about hiding something from me. I thought she needed to use the bathroom since she had her hands down in that area (TMI). She kept stealing glances at me, I just smiled (I had already asked the bathroom question). Finally, she sneakily reached up into her dress (from below -- we are sitting on the bench at church mind you) and pulled her pedometer out.

Do you think this headband might be a little over-the-top?

It just made me chuckle. She had to go through quite a few layers of ruffles and then had to find the pedometer which had no place to attach but her underwear. I guess she was wanting to get some exercise in with her religion.


Four Eyes

How bad could it possibly be?

One of my children has always given me the impression that she adores me. She has clearly been my little pet. Somehow today, I have rocked her world and I guess the bubble has officially burst.

To introduce my story, let me just say that I have owned a pair of reading glasses for over 15 years. Just because I sometimes only wear them once a year really doesn't change the fact that they are in my possession.

Now, to back my story up, I printed out an article I needed to study using a ridiculously small font size (there are over 200 slides in the presentation/article!). I have been hefting around my 25 or so sheets of paper, trying to grab a few minutes of study when I could.

OK, today I took my above-mentioned daughter into a doctor for an eye exam. While in the waiting room, I put on my glasses and started studying. She looked at me and said,

"Whose glasses are those Mom?"

They're mine.

"Are they really yours? Those glasses are really freaking me out" (I don't think I've ever heard her use this phrase before)

"Does Dad know you have glasses?"

"Are you going to get a surgery to fix your eyes?"

"Please don't wear those around me."

I couldn't even make this stuff up. I have shaken the rug right out from under her. Our little bond is forever disintegrating.

I was so taken back by her response, I asked her to take a picture of me so that I will always remember the day her world ended.



Mom, "What does ***** mean?"

I guess with all the drinking and smoking we did over spring break, I shouldn't be surprised swearing also joined our party.

During one of our many meals in the dining room flanked by decor about both drinking and smoking :-), my son asked me what "dammit" means.

Here we go. . . . . . .

To Drink, or Not To Drink

Spring Break 2013, here's the rundown:



Oregon/Washington Border -- that's the mighty Columbia Rvr in the background



• cold and rainy here
• cold and rainy there (planned destination - Seaside Oregon)
• kids bored and at each other's throats here
• kids turn into magical creatures somewhere else (fingers crossed)

My Magical Creatures

So, off we headed, down the coast and highway 101 (some of the way).

We stayed in an itty bitty rental house on the coast. This is my first official "vacation rental by owner" experience and I can't say that I am 100% satisfied, but honestly, it was good enough. I kind of chuckle to compare the house I stayed in with those around me, I'll bet you can't find it in the picture:

Our estuary beach -- look very closely for the house

 

Anyway, we had a good time. The kids loved the close beach proximity. This beach isn't the ocean beach but an estuary beach. When the tide came in, the water went clear up to the bank. I love watching the tide. in fact, I think I could just sit and watch the ocean for hours and hours.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Anne of Green Gables

 

But, what really got my kids talking and asking questions was this:

 

Befuddled, Perplexed, Kerflummoxed -- ha ha ha

 This was above our dining room table and we must have had the "drinking" discussion about 7 times, that is until they discovered an equally confusing sign across the room that said, "Please feel free to smoke - outside".

 

Lastly, just so I always remember that we tried to walk where Meriwhether Lewis walked:

 

 I say "try" because as with a few other endeavors (1 - crossing the estuary to get to the real ocean, and 2 - trying to build a fire with wet wood), we had to give up after about 20 minutes. The trail was so treacherous (for little girls - one of whom was wearing flip flops) and muddy. My son asked, "Mom, can we just come back here and do this hike while the girls are sleeping?"

Easter April Fools

Easter morning, my family awakened to find a real easter bunny had hopped to our house.

Serious.

Can you see the tracks?

They were right up to our front door. Cue the smiles -- on Easter.

However, the tracks were still there for the next day - April Fools. And, for that matter, the tracks are still here today. My easter bunny trickster sent an apologetic text saying the paint claimed to be washable, but for some reason none of these tracks are going away . . .

Would you like a paper clip?

Happy Easter

 

Easter came and went. Fun was had by all. Kids got sugared up. The hunt is really fun - fun for the kids, fun for the parents. I do enjoy a good hunt.

 

 

The problem with holidays - these days - is that they aren't just one-day affairs. By the time my children were on their third easter egg hunt, I decided to let them take charge in filling up the eggs we were to contribute to the event. Our family was to bring 12 filled easter eggs. So, I told the kids to each fill up four eggs with whatever they wanted.

 

Fortunately for my son, I discovered my oldest daughter had nabbed a few of his little army men to give away in her designated eggs. I didn't think to check her other eggs.

 

During the middle of the hunt, I heard a few kids cry out that they didn't want the rocks in their Easter Eggs. Then, at the end of the hunt, I heard another child telling his mom he wasn't really interested in the paper clips he found in his Easter Egg. 

 

Jeesh - I recognized the paper clips. What a way to make a parent look like a cheap-skate and an Easter Grinch!  I hope your hunts were more fruitful.

 

One Way or Another - Someone's Out To Get Me

I got maced the other day.

I think.

I was on my way to pick up the babysitter and popped a mint in my mouth. It was one of those bumpy mints that come in a small, round canister. One side says, "To Share" the other says, "Not to Share" (of course this is the big side). Anyway, my mint was one of those kinds.

I sucked on it for a few minutes when I realized it was getting really minty, really fast. My stomach started to feel a bit nauseus and my throat began to really hurt. It was as though I could feel my throat beginning to constrict. I took the mint out and threw it away. My eyes started watering like crazy.

I arrived at the babysitter's home with tears in my eyes and feeling pretty disoriented. But, I was on a schedule :-)  I needed to get to my appointment regardless of being able to breathe. My friend (the mother) asked me if I was OK. I just said, "No, not really, but I think it will get better."  I am glad she still let me take her daughter.

It was an awful experience. It probably took 15 minutes for all of those strange symptoms to go away. Later that day, I explained to another friend and her husband what happened and he said, "Those are the exact symptoms of someone getting mace in their face".

So, there you have it. Someone's watching . . . .